What goes in must come out...

Don't they look yummy! I thought they were I made them for a funeral a few months back they were white flour, honey, and honey butter glazed...delish!

Food, its important its keeps us going, gives comfort (especially here in the south), brings people together....I am sure we could come up with more.

I have been thinking lately and I know, I know that ALWAYS gets me in trouble, food is important but the kinds of food is what is more important.

For two years now I have had anxiety I am really and I mean really tired of it. Sometimes I cry because I am so tired of it, feelings of being nothing but a problem and nothing but trouble plague me sometimes. Of course being told this by someone doesn't help at all. I have been told by 2 people that my family and church family are very unhappy because of me. This on top of other things has made me turn in on myself made me reevaluate what I do and who I do it with, who I talk to and now everytime I walk in the temple I cry since I feel I am not worthy to be there because someone else made me feel I was unworthy of every breath I take.

So this post isn't just what we put in our mouths but what we let go into our ears and how it comes out.  I love to cook I am not very good at it but I do love to cook with plain ingredients, real foods, not canned foods creating something out of something basic makes me feel good.

Almost three weeks ago I gave up colas I love them I mean really love them. Coke and Dr Pepper are my favorites unfortunately. I don't drink coffee or black tea, I don't even know how to make coffee but colas are my downfall. One Saturday hubby and I went grocery shopping and we grabbed a coke to share while we shopped about 10 minutes maybe less after I took my first sip the anxiety started and was really bad I just wanted out of the store leave the cart where it was and leave. I pushed on hubby was with me... he always helps and is patient with me.

As I went to take another sip of coke it hit me that I was fine until I drank that cola. So I haven't had one in 2 1/2 weeks and the anxiety hasn't been so bad. It's there but not heart racing can't catch my breath panic attack anxiety.

So I have been thinking alot and colas are the first my next favorite is brownies so they are next probably at least for now. I know to listen to my body and I can figure out what is wrong that way but the last two years I have only heard the anxiety and that has made me blow up what I think I am hearing.

I know that white flour, white sugars, lets just say breads in general bother me not in the way that my health isn't bad but sensitive too. I am actually a healthly person, overweight and feeling old somedays, but healthy. I have been rough on body so I have sore shoulders sometimes, I have heel spurs that make my feet hurt each are just normal wear as we get older.

Now what I let go in my mouth makes me feel weird sometimes, colas for one, breads all kinds, white sugar, fake sugars, desserts, pastas, anything processed to the point of not knowing it started as a food at some point. Weird things happen nerves on fire, feet and hands swelling, etc but this is my body telling me stop putting that in your mouth it doesn't like it. On top of this taking a man made medication for anxiety and wanting to get off it makes you hear all kinds of false things. I know my body doesn't like these things and have known this but with my anxiety has made it bigger than life its self sometimes.

I started on a journey years ago stopped and have recently started again things that are wholesome and God made have never affected me, those things that are man made have always made me feel yucky and out of sorts. Just like sitting inside all day in the AC with all my man made conviences make me feel out of sorts and being outside working to exhaustion and breathing in the hot humid air and soaking up Gods creation makes me feel good, satisfied.

What we let go into our bodies whether its by mouth, sight, ears, or through our biggest organ our skin affect us in more ways than we can ever imagine.  I let myself eat and hear what I shouldn't, I let it soak in so that my body feels it and is trying so hard to tell me to stop.

I had the kids make posters years ago on one side they put pictures man made things and on the other they put things only made by God that side was the prettiest.

Words can be man made or God made as well what we let come out of our mouths can affect people in so many ways. We should think and let the words come that we know our Father in Heaven would want us to say.

I hope that all have a very blessed day and I have been so busy building a goat stall, gates, gardening, canning, sewing, etc that I haven't even thought of blogging. But I will do a plain and simple post before the end of the week. The kiddos are going to youth conference this weekend so we have been sewing skirts for Ashley and 2 new ties for Wyatt.

Blessing,

Erika

Walking your Path...

Wisdom teeth pulled and all is fine in our home. They did great and the first thing Ashley said to me when she saw me was, "your in trouble". :0) But its over and I promise you'll never have to do that again.

While they were going through their thing I was slowly getting a sore throat, as I sat in the waiting room it got worse and worse by the end of the day I was running a fever and miserable. So the three of us were on the couch by the time daddy got home that night. We were all snuggled up under blankets me with throat lozenges and them with ice packs. :0) Needless to say our weekend was a slow one.

But today is Monday and we are all on the upside of healing their swelling is going down, and my voice is coming back. Saturday I couldn't get above a whisper so they watched movies and I sewed a new blouse I will try to get a picture of it to post tomorrow.

I have been thinking a lot lately of who I am and my path in this life. I am of the opinion that opinions are hurtful and I try to keep mine to myself. I also try not to follow the crowd it just isn't my thing to be like everyone else. I have as an adult learned that beating to the tune of my own drum is what I am happiest at. Being friends with those who are dear friends not a conquest on the popular ladder of the world.

The crowd is so cumbersome, you get lost in the numbers and you end up loosing what makes you...you. I am an individual with thoughts and ideas of my own they might be weird, non conforming, or even rebellious, but they are mine and I find comfort in that.

I find that being myself though different from the rest makes me stand out most of the time, I am happy being who I am. Yes I struggle sometimes with the hurtful words, looks, or the opinions of the world. But I try to keep plugging away at my life the best way I know how, what works for me. Opinions are just that, someone elses idea of what their world should be, and it turns into an opinion when they force it on others. They are just ideas, their interpretation of the world and how they want to live it.

Getting lost in those ideas being spouted around us can be overwhelming, we can get anxious and hurt. Lost in a number and forgetting or even not even learning what makes us tick, makes our world turn, or helps us see and know what it is we are suppose to do in this life.

I might walk alone in this world of opinions, ideas, hurtful words or actions, but I think I know that what I choose works for me and mine and that my ideas are just that, mine they make me who I am. I might not agree with the world's view on most things, but I know what I agree on for me works and when it doesn't I tweek it and work towards it working for me not others.

And as far as letting the world know what those ideas are...well my example should be all that should show. I don't listen to others opinions especially when they are shoved at me or contradict my ideas, but I do watch when someone is quietly living those ideas, and is an example to me.

I hope your example of bright and a beacon to those around you. Have a wonderfully blessed day.

Love,

Erika

A Post

Hubby keeps telling me to post and I just can't. Have you ever gotten like that, when everything you think of to post you think is boring or no one would want to read it. ;)

I am working on a talk right now for Nov 13 the topic is Who Am I? so that has been taking all my left over mental space after, homeschooling, homemaking, sickness, etc. Needless to say not much mental space is left for it. I get snippets of thought here and there, and I have started a list of those bits and pieces. I am one of those speakers that can't write out a talk I take notes a word here, a thought there, a scripture, quote, etc, and then when I am at the podium I let the spirit guide in what I need to learn and convey. This way of speaking for me is very inspirational when I plan it out and write it out they are always duds.

Yesterday I took some pictures of the kitchen to just put in a post, of course I cleaned it beforehand. ;) Afterwards I pulled out the meat grinder ground some turkey, made ricotta, and later made lasagnia with both, pulled fresh made cheese from the press and set it to air dry. And pondered stuff....

The big pot on the stove is a gallon and a half of whey from Monday's cheese making. There are ways to make ricotta with powdered milk and regular whole milk and I have done both. But this last spring I learned to make it with the leftover whey which is the traditional way to make ricotta. You don't get as much this way as you would the other ways, but that is not the purpose. Boy I used way and whey way to much didn't I. :0) I would normally keep some fresh whey for culturing, but not this time.

I later ground homegrown turkey meat since Wyatt asked for lasagnia and he likes meat when I usually make a veggie variety. The sauce was home canned this summer, cheese homemade, meat homegrown, the noodles were storebought. And then I cooked it in the sun oven very yummy meal!

Also in this picture is my $10 thrift store find of the Big Berkey that also included 4 brand new filters. A bucket of white wheat berries, this bucket is one that isn't sealed and I scoop out what I need.

To the left of the stove is my area for making vinegars, the sour dough starter is there, and other yummy fermenting, culturing, and sour doughing things. Oh and cheese making area.

The other side of the stove, if I would have moved a little more you would have seen a gigantic pile of dishes. :) This area of the house is used A LOT, there is a bowl with soaking cheese clothes, a couple of mixing bowls ready to use, the garlic storage thingie, wooden cutting boards, and rolling pin.

Cheese set out to dry, Herman the sour dough starter along with fresh ground wheat to feed him, and 2 jars of apple cidar vinegar aging. Oh the weights were from the cheese making I just took it out of the mold and hadn't put the 30lbs of weights up yet. Here you can see what kind of mold I use it is called a Tomme, for what we do and the amount we make it works perfectly for us.

Herman the sour dough starter is a daily thing, if I am not needing to use it I just add a tablespoon of flour and one of water and give a good stir once a day. If I know I will need it for something the day before I will add a much larger amount of flour and water to build it up to the amount I might need. I could leave it in the fridge feeding it once a week and I did try to do that in Sept, but forgot to feed it. A little over a month later I pulled the jar out fed it and it was fine, bubbly and active. But I was lucky.

Also doing it the way I do, not using every single day it can get very sour so I have figured out that if I pour off the liquid that forms at the top and then feed it that keeps that sourness away. This liquid is called hooch which I thought was so funny the sourness mostly comes from the hooch. I don't use Herman every day but a few times a week and it works beautifully the way I have worked it for us. Oh and I put it in a clean jar every few days.

This is one of my herb cabinets, there is another one under this one. These are all in the same area as the above counter top. I have all kinds a things in here and below, I just finished a course through The School of Natural Healing and really learned alot. I enjoyed it very much and am trying to implement the teachings into our daily lives it is a slow process, but also I am listening to my body. Your body will tell you what is wrong if you listen and how to correct it. Like halloween candy will always make my hands and feet numb because my body can't or doesn't want to process it, so I should just avoid it, the numbness is it telling me that. :0)

Our little Fall Harvest for church was at a members house this year. The kiddos always come up with something to dress up, last year Ashley made her costume she was a greek thesbian, this year a fairy from Mid Summers Nights Dream one of Shakespeares works. She loves Shakespeare and actually understands it all, but math baffles her.  A few years ago, 6 actually, I made a skirt with pumpkins all over it that I usually wear and hubby and I try to find funny hats to wear. We found a bunch of halloween fabric marked down last year so I made a new skirt this year.

I wore the skirt, feather boa, and one of the many hats. We don't celebrate Halloween, but every year we have made or something, the kids a dress up outfit that they used to play in year round, we'd go to grandma's and then home, carve a pumpkin maybe, go to our church's fall harvest. But we have never gotten into the whole scary commercialism of it all. So now that the kids are alot older they have kept the tradition of having fun planning a dress up theme to wear to the fall harvest. Wyatt loved Gilligan's Island and last year we were going to dress him and his dad up as Gilligan and Skipper but didn't have enough time to put it all together.

We had alot of fun as usual, we had several different kinds of chili, stews, a bonfire, hay ride, and just a alot of fun visiting with friends.

Well such a long post of really nothing, well not nothing just snippets of my little world. Simple and unadorned, the photo above actually was taken before I brushed my hair I took my sleeping braids and coiled them in a bun so I could get my sewing done early before the kids woke so really simple and unadorned :0).

My life revolves around our daily doings, the kitchen, providing meals, preparing for future meals, sewing, my family, my love of learning a simplier way to live even if it may be harder than doing it with all the time saving gadgets on the market. Remembering to slow down take a breath and truly look at my little world I love so much. I forget that sometimes, and feel very bad for it guilt and uncertainty take hold till I am reminded to look and breath.

I leave you with a recipe that I have looked and looked for since I wanted to try it and finally found it.

Skillet Granola

2 Tbsp olive oil or coconut oil

4 cups rolled oats

1/2 c butter

1 tsp vanilla

4 Tbsp honey

1/2 cup brown sugar

(since I don't use this or white sugar, sucanat, rapadura, or even more honey would work)

1/2 c almonds

1/2 c dried fruit

heat oil in large skillet over medium heat. Add oats then cook and stir until starting to brown and crisp, about 5 minutes. Push the oats to the side of the pan. Melt butter in the same pan over medium heat. Stir in honey and brown sugar; cook, stirring constantly, until bubbly. Push the oats around in the pan and stir to combine. Cook and stir for another 5 minutes or so to make sure to coat throughly. Pour out onto the cookie sheet and spread to cool.

After cool add nuts and dried fruit you can also add 1/2 tsp cinnamon or nutmeg if you want. This would taste great on yogurt or add coconut etc too make a trail mix. However you like your granola enjoy this simple recipe.

Have a simply blessed day....

Love, Erika

Oh and a question if you would be so kind to give me your thoughts. When I write or say Who Am I? what comes to mind about yourself? I am wanting quotes from those sweet women around me on their thoughts on who they are in their minds. Thank You for commenting and sharing your answer.

Plain and Simple

Plain and Simple that is our family, we like things to be so basic in all we do. We love all and except all. Well, there are some that can get on the last nerve, but I can honestly say we have tried with them and it is a daily battle to keep trying.  

Our children, when reading the scriptures they will come to a place where it is calling a Donkey an ass they will say donkey, so they don't have to say the other word. When faced with words that are offensive to them like, dumb, stupid, shut up, they will skip them. They have always refused to say them even when learning to read, at a young age they both knew it was a bad word and refused to read it. It is sad to hear a 3 yr old saying these words and the parents encourage them to use them or aren't bothered by them.

Now as teens they are kind hearted, they knit pick each other sometimes, but they are kind to all. Especially those who most others are mean to.

a car wash for the van, we will gather up quarters sometimes so we can have a car wash instead of doing it ourselves. The kids and I find this to be a hoot since we laugh and joke while in the wash.

Last night we took our kids to a dance at church at our stake center. They said they had fun and met up with friends of theirs they only see at things like this. Ashley and her friend Hannah were excited to see each other. They are two peas in a pod, and the moment I first met Hannah I fell in love, she reminded me so much of my Ashley. Quiet, reserved, shy, but with a spark in their eyes that they don't let to many people see.

But, then you have the rest of the kids there, you remember the incrowd...I was never in the incrowd. They are the ones that seem to have it all, and don't even realize there are other people in this world beside the perfect little people in their own lives. They are more than ready to take on the world and step all over those who are a little slower, shyer, awkwarder...

Nothing beats a nice early morning nap on mom and dad's bed, especially if you can get there before mom makes it. All that is missing is Pippin the youngest. But he later got in, and caused a bunch of discontent by pouncing on them all. Wheezy (15yrs old), Buster and Lucky ( 9 yrs old), Pippin (1 yr old).

My kids and my husband and I are those shy, awkward people. Though our son seems to be able to jump into anything and be ok, a gift for certain, he still is shy. The rest of us, well though I married at 19 and had Ashley 14 months later, I still took some time to come out of my shell. And now as an almost 38 year old I see that it is OK to be a little slower to develop, to grow into your talents, to find yourself.

This is where hubby and I were this weekend, a peaceful place that I just love to go to. This was taken at about 7:30 in the morning, it was cool with a slit breeze, a true blessing.

Last night the kids had fun, though they were faced with the awkwardness of the world, being asked to dance or not, asking and being turned down, and then asking those who others made fun of openly. Will they be OK with this, yes they will, will they learn from this, most definately.

Ashley driving me to town Monday to mail a package. It makes her so nervous to drive, but at least she isn't cocky about it, she is cautious about it, safe.

I know for this Mama, it hurts to see your kids faced with the world and standing there while it happens. You know it will be OK, you know that this to will pass, but you still hurt inside for them remembering those feelings that were stirred inside.

Recently we have been discussing alot of what it means to be a christian, and we have learned alot from our discussions.

You have christians who say they are but, well don't really act or look like it. You have those that are very bold with their belief system, very pushy with what they preceive being a christian is. And then you have those that quietly live what they believe, learning, growing daily they show their love for the Savior in a quiet gentle way and by their examples.

No one Christian is the perfect model of what a christian should be, and just because we say we are christian doesn't mean we are perfect. We all get trapped in pitfalls, our kids tease or are teased by other christian kids, adults are judgemental of those around them who are their brothers and sisters, etc etc.

A lone butterfly sipping from the hummingbird feeder among a bunch of yellow jackets.

We are here on this world to be that lone ranger, to be that good example, to stand out in rightousness for others. But at what cost are we willing to be that person, are we willing to step over and on those we feel are beneath us, or are we willing to quietly, lovingly give a hand to those left behind in the social gene pool to pick them up, dust them off, and walk together in this world.

This world is not easy, and I for one am proud of my kids for being those different sort of people that find hate, even by those who say they are christians to be offensive. Who jump and lend a hand to the underdog, who in their own ways are the underdogs, but are Ok with it.

Are you?

I hope you have a wonderfully blessed day,

Love,

Erika

Sabbath Day Prep...

I have a confession to make.....ready....I am
ADD. Wow, you thought I was going to say something really bad weren't you ;).

When I was a kid I was very hyper and had a very hard time focusing. As a teen that transformed into a very unfocused, out of control, trouble finding person. When our oldest was little she left the energizer bunny in the dust. non stop she hardly slept. But being the weirdo, non-conformists that we are we refused the traditional world standard on treating this very active child for a more a healthier way and in the end teachable way.

A trampoline works great for a child who is constantly moving. Talking to them, training them works and how do I know that, that is what we did. She now is a 17 year old than understands herself and has worked hard to control herself. And the trampoline found a new home a couple of years ago.

So while we learned to help her with her bouncing off the walls I learned to treat myself as well. I was never taught or talked to about my hyperness and wondering mind, I was given meds. So I learned to see in myself what triggered, how to focus, and to organize myself. I am a tad OCD now, OK,ALOT, but I don't run around like a chicken with my head cut off anymore getting absolutely nothing done. Well, I didn't till the last couple of months.

Our minds move so fast with so many things that it is hard to catch one single thought and focus. Her and I both now understand each other very well and she is learning daily to focus herself. It is a daily work and a daily struggle. Over the last eight months I have lost that focus due to health issues. Well I am taking back that focus.

Sunday prep is one of those focus factors. This week I have tried all kinds of crockpot recipes, you see I use to prepare a meal the day before in the crockpot, pop it in the cooking base the morning of and have a nice meal waiting for us when we got home. But, that has gotten to be a lost cause the last couple of months.

We also used to prepare everything clothing, bags, etc so that there was no work on Sunday and leaving the house was a breeze. Well, my wondering mind got lost on a bright shiny object and that focus with it.

So today I have three recipes to go in my crockpots, one for tonight, one for tomorrow breakfast, and one for tomorrow lunch. We snack at dinner on Sunday.

So for Sunday Prep:

1. meal in crockpot or pots Saturday night along with side dishes prepared.

(Philly Steak and Cheese with a Salad)

2. Clothing ironed and set out. (These I try to wash and Iron on Mondays)

3. Church lessons etc prepared, read, or at least skimmed through depending on if we are teaching, talking, or listening.

4. Church bags packed and set in back of van, as well as a snack since we are usually at the building late and grabbing a snack or junk on the way home is so easy..remembering to keep the sabbath day holy...Or as the 14 yr old, fast growing boy does; raids the nursery's snacks that are kept in his dad's office to keep older kids from raiding them. Gold Fish and fruit snacks are a permanant fixture on my Sam's Club shopping list thanks to him. :0)

5. House set to rights and clean so it's not a distracting stess factor for me when we come home on Sunday.

It takes some mental prep and focus, an hour of work and we are ready to focus on what is needed on our day of rest. I am off to finish my work.

How to you prepare yourself for the Sabbath Day?

love,

Erika

Work

I am one of those people that believes to feel fullfilled in this life you need to work, and work hard.  That doesn't mean that I work hard everyday...:0) And on the days I am lazy I get very blue. On the days that I work I feel like I've accomplished something, and on the days I fall into bed exhausted I know I have done a good days work.

I know that there are many in this world who want it easy and a few years ago I learned that one of the counties I live near has a 40% multiple welfare recipent rate. Meaning that 2 or 3 generations of the family have and do live off welfare and don't work at all and never have. One generation taught the other and so on. This is all they know and all they want.

I know for me to feel like I have done a job well, I feel fullfilled, but to not do anything I know I have not followed Heavenly Father's plan. I need to meet him somewhere along the line, do my part no matter how large or small it is. He is always there to help me along and guide me.

In the end I learn so much about myself and Heavenly Father.

Yesterday, the kids and I went to an organic blueberry farm near us. Not 5 minutes from our home, we had a lovely time. Yguy is very into Greek, Roman, and Egyptian myths, and at the moment Egyptian, so he gave us a lesson on the different gods and goddesses they believed in. We had an interesting discussion on why they believed in many and not the one and only etc.

The blueberries were so abundant we had 2 gallons in less that an hour. They were so juicy and good my tongue and lips were blue from eating them off the bush. We came home and canned a gallon up for this winter's scones, pancakes, and other delights. And left the other gallon to eat as we want, or we might make jam out of them.

I also wrapped up the cheddar cheese I made Monday I can't wait to try it in 4 weeks.

We also canned up 19 pints of chicken meat yesterday and today we are simmering the bones with herbs to make a yummy stock to can up.

This time of year is full of work but it feels so good. Sometimes I feel like a chicken with my head cut off running around, but in the end it feels very rewarding, and I feel like I've done a job well and to be proud of.

Today, is another day of work weeding some, adding worms to the compost, and some others small things that need our attention. At the end of the day I hope to feel I've done a job well.

I hope you have a blessed day..

Love

Erika

Christlike Communication

Yesterday we had a lesson in Relief Society that I enjoyed very much and wanted to share it with you.

I love mothers who seem to have it all together; they speak softly to there children, and the children listen and behave; they are always doing great and wonderous things for their children; they have patience....

I am not one of those mothers, I have been blessed with what my mom has always called a stage whisper I have no trouble broadcasting my voice if the mic is out at church and I am giving a talk. I have not always been the most patient with my children, and I am not creative. But, I do love them very much and have done the best I can do and have learned in the process.

I will say my husband's calling at church has really helped me with my patience at first it tried them very much and I had a very difficult time. But, now it isn't so hard and I have noticed that my relationship with my children has gotten better because of it.

The below clips are taken from and article by L. Lionel Kendrick, "Christlike Communications", Ensign, Nov. 1988,

Heavenly Father has given us a priceless gift in our capacity to communicate with each other. Our communications are at the core of our relationships with others. If we are to return home safely to Heavenly Father, we must develop righteous relationships with His children here in mortality.



Our communications reflect in our countenance. Therefore, we must be careful not only what we communicate, but also how we do so. Souls can be strengthened or shattered by the message and the manner in which we communicate.

There are certain kinds of un-Christlike communications which destroy relationships and are not for our development but are for our destruction. They result in a diminished opportunity of returning home safely to Heavenly Father. One of the major ways that Satan uses to retard the development of righteous relationships is in the use of gossip, rumor, and slander on his communication network. Perhaps the more common un-Christlike communications are those of lying, blaming, criticizing, and anger.



1. Lying. The first of these communications is that of lying. To lie is to be untruthful, deceptive, deceitful, and dishonest. This is a basic communications problem which is not new; it goes back to the Garden of Eden.


2. Blaming. A second un-Christlike communication is that of blaming. This is a condemning communication. It is interesting that when the Lord confronted Adam in his fallen state, Adam began to place the blame on Eve for his actions. He said, “The woman whom thou gavest to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat.” (Gen. 3:12.) When Eve was confronted, she placed the blame on Satan. She said, “The serpent beguiled me, and I did eat.” (Gen. 3:13.)



3. Criticizing. A third un-Christlike communication is that of criticizing. Positive criticism is feedback given with the purpose of helping another person to grow and to develop. This is both helpful and needful and is generally accepted and appreciated.



Negative criticism is intended to hurt and often to defame and to destroy. This caustic communication is cruel, and it tends to crush the character of all of those about whom it is directed. King Benjamin urged his people to “not have a mind to injure one another, but to live peaceably.” (Mosiah 4:13.) We should surely follow this counsel and defend those who are defamed by these denouncements.


4. Anger. A fourth is anger. This is perhaps the most common form of un-Christlike communication. Anger causes anguish to the souls of all of those who experience the feeling as well as to those who are the recipients of this emotional explosion.


Anger shows a lack of self-control and an inability to relate in a righteous way to others. It is a senseless substitute for self-control. It is sometimes used as a selfish strategy to gain control of a relationship. President Wilford Woodruff counseled that “the moment a man or a woman becomes angry they show a great weakness.”


May we be found communicating with each other in a manner in which the Savior would communicate. Christlike communications are expressed in tones of love rather than loudness. They are intended to be helpful rather than hurtful. They tend to bind us together rather than to drive us apart. They tend to build rather than to belittle.



Christlike communications are expressions of affection and not anger, truth and not fabrication, compassion and not contention, respect and not ridicule, counsel and not criticism, correction and not condemnation. They are spoken with clarity and not with confusion. They may be tender or they may be tough, but they must always be tempered.


The real challenge that we face in our communications with others is to condition our hearts to have Christlike feelings for all of Heavenly Father’s children. When we develop this concern for the condition of others, we then will communicate with them as the Savior would. We will then warm the hearts of those who may be suffering in silence. As we meet people with special needs along life’s way, we can then make their journey brighter by the things that we say.


Christlike communications will help us to develop righteous relationships and ultimately to return to our heavenly home safely. May we treasure the divine gift of communication, and may we use it wisely to build and to assist others on this marvelous journey through mortality. May Heavenly Father bless us to this end, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

I enjoyed the reminders this lesson brought to me in my quest to grow rightouesly. I know I have a long way to go and I know that by daily working on my relationships with those who are most important to me it will spill out to those in the world around me.
 
May you have a blessed day...
Love,
 
Erika

Fog

We woke to fog this morning, but that is not very unusual this time of year.  It has burned off pretty fast as the sun has risen you can still see wisps of it here and there.

Sunday, on our way to church the fog was so thick you couldn't see very far in front of you while driving. We have had it so thick we couldn't see to the end of our driveway or the front pasture.  But, that is the norm this time of year and in the fall.

The fog makes every thing very wet and the air very damp. But, as the sun rises it burns off the fog and rays of light peep thru and slowly light and warm the earth.

This morning I was comparing the fog to life there are times in our lives we can't see where we are going we have not a clue what direction we need to go. Seeing past ourselves and our problems is very hard because of the dense fog in front of us.

Then the sun shines thru and we see rays peeping thru in places and they light things enough for us to see
the direction we need to go. As we move towards that direction the fog burns off even more and our path clears.

Little things in our life help us hold on and have patience until that fog clears. We learn and grow in that fog. The love our Savior has for us if we embrace it help us have the fortitude to stand strong thru our adversity and patience to wait for the rays to come thru.

Little things like the love around us even in this potato I pulled out shaped like a heart can help us be strong.

Finding joy in all things even our adversity can be hard and be quite frustrating, but we can do it and learn from it.

This chicken was trying to help me mend some clothing the other day while I sat on the front porch. She wanted the thread badly to it made sewing a little bit of a challenge. But, I prevailed and finished all my mending.

I hope that you day and you weekend are blessed beyong measure.

love,

Erika

Choices

Choices, Choices, Choices, we are free to choose what we wear, what we eat, what we do in life. So many things to choose from, no wonder so many people have so many problems. But, it is our free agency to choose and not have someone or thing choose for us and tell what we are to do.

I remember in high school wanting to follow the in crowd, they all wore certain brands, certain styles, and did cool things. We were choosing to follow what we thought was the cool thing to do. But, did we listen to hear what we were suppose to do.

We all have a different path that leads us to the same destination, but we all are different and our path to that destination will be different than our neighbor because we learn differently, we are different.

But, does that mean that our neighbor or we are wrong? No, we just have to choose for ourselves what our path is. We will sometimes make a wrong turn and find that the path is no longer the one to the destination we want, so we have to back track.

And this is where that learning comes in I will learn from my adversity in a much different way than my neighbor or my family. I will learn to listen to the still small voice and then correct my course to the destination I dearly want to go to.

Our paths are different, and what we do on that path is unique to us. Heavenly Father knows we are different and knows what pertains to me and how I learn is different from my husband, and even my children.

What I choose to do in my life is what I feel is my path at that moment. Though others will criticize and chastise me for my decisions. My decisions I hope are based on what I "hear" in my prayers and in my heart for me to learn and feel what the Lord has in store for me.

Love,

Erika

Faith

Faith

Faith is knowing the sun will rise,

lighting each new day.

Faith is knowing the Lord will hear my prayers each time I pray.

Faith is like a little seed:

If planted it will grow.

Faith is a swelling within my heart.

When I do right I know.

Faith is knowing I lived with God before my mortal birth.

Faith is knowing I can return when my life ends on earth.

Faith is trust in God above:

In Christ, who showed the way.

Faith is strengthened:

I feel it grow

When ever I obey.

LDS Childrens Songbook

A Christmas cactus will only bloom once a year, about this time every year my cactus will put forth pink, salmon, and white blooms. I look forward to it every year and enjoy the profuse colors it showers on us.

I  know every year that this wonderful blessing will happen. Why is it so easy to have faith in something like this flower that we can see and touch? But, we have such a hard time finding faith in the unseen...

I know though I cannot see that I am loved my a Heavenly being. I know that the knowledge of this love carries me daily and I am so greatful for it.

To be truly lost is not having this faith and I am thankful daily that I take those steps to have this wonderful feeling in my life.

Have a Blessed Day

Erika

Attracting Attention

I recently had a conversation with someone that has had me thinking a lot lately. This person has been in my life a long time so previous conversations that would go along with the topic have been popping in my head.

A comment was made about women and those that attract attention to themselves just for the sake of getting attention whether it is good or bad. A statement was made along the lines of, "I turn lots of heads when I walk in a room."

That simple statement and many others made throughout the years has me pondering how much a woman can be the fault of a man falling.

Chastity

Chastity is sexual purity. Those who are chaste are morally clean in their thoughts, words, and actions. Chastity means not having any sexual relations before marriage. It also means complete fidelity to husband or wife during marriage.

We can affect so much just by how we behave, look, or our attitude in public. I remember as a teenager and wanting attention and not caring how I got it. I thought if  I acted a certain way I would get what I wanted. Well, I got what I deserved and that is all I'll say. :0) I had bleached white hair, 3 earrings in each ear, heavy makeup, (blue was the color and electric blue mascara was a favorite).....I did things all for the sake of attention that has taken me years to forgive myself for.

As I raise my children to love and respect themselves and the opposite sex I find statements like the one above offensive. I think that we should feel good about ourselves and that we should want to look nice for our husband...But, there is that fine line of are we desiring to attract every male in the room when we walk in.

When we get ready to go somewhere do we want to attract the eye of a man we might see, do we willingly seduce him with how we dress or act to build our ego? Do we find this to be harmful or not?

Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery:

But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.  Matt 5:27-28

Are we being that woman? I have over the years swayed the way I act and dress to conform with how I feel on this subject. I have also worked on what I think if I walk in and immediately start checking out guys I am being the scripture above. "It doesn't hurt to look," I have heard this many times its what that looking brings on down the rode. It starts with a look and then more.

I want Jesus in my countenance and by acting like the world I am doing exactly what Satan wants and my countenance shows it.

Have a Blessed Day

Erika

We're Home

We got home about an hour ago. We have a stack of laundry....really alot of laundry which is totally amazing. We are tired, exhausted, sore in places we didn't think you could be, my feet are swollen and tired from standing all day long and long into the night since Tuesday.

But.....It was so exhilarating, spiritually refueling, and a good kind of exhausting that only comes from these kind of experiences. I am putting things away checking emails, and making cookies for the dads at church tomorrow. Trying to keep moving since I know when I stop I will crash but if I could do it again I would in a heart beat.

To spend 4 days with 90 teenage girls, many adult leaders, cooking for them, seeing the energy pour off them as they build each other up, see them learn and teach each other the love the Savior and Heavenly Father have for them, and see them cope with feeling the spirit so strong they might drown in it, and then pour out their testimonies in a powerful testimony meeting that leaves all feeling so refreshed and fueled it will carry us through the next few weeks.

For me at this moment the exhaustion is fierce, the tears are right on the edge, the spirit so strong....

I can't wait till next year......

"Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference"     Winston Churchill

I love oil lamps, all the oil lamps we used while we lived off grid in Montana I still have with the exception of one which broke when we moved.

We have used them in the last 12 years during power outages, hurricanes, after Hurricane Katrina for 2 weeks which was so nice to be taken back to the simpleness of them. We sat on the front porch every night while darkness surrounded us and the exhaustion of clearing trees, feeding people, helping people find loved ones lost in the storm, and the many things our family took part in after the storm.

We use one at dinner time most of the time and we have one in the living room that is lite sometimes as well. I have more in the closet ready if we need them in emergencies. But I have thought of getting them out for everyday.

 I love the quote at the top, our attitude can change how we react to things, how others react to us and things, and how we cope with things in our lives.  A good attitude says so much about someone. I know several women who have such wonderful attitudes about life and they are such an influence in my life I want to follow their example it makes such a difference when you are postive even in an very negative situation.

A dear sister in our branch lost her husband this past week and though the situation was hard for her she had such a wonderful smile on her face and such gratitude for the time she had with him. As we visited with her each time she was smiling and laughing at the happy times she had with her dear husband. Her attitude was very postive in a very sad situation.

These wonderful examples of righteous women in my life is a wonderful thing and something I need. I want to see things the way Christ sees them I want to see the good in all even when all we see is bad. Somewhere inside them is a spect a goodness that needs to be cultivated and loved so it will bloom.

My oil lamps light the darkness and I am so greatful for the warm light. A good attitude will warm our hearts to work hard thru difficult times and see what the blessings are on the other side.

Pondering

.....feast upon the words of Christ; behold, the words of Christ will tell you all things what ye should do. 2 Nephi 32:3

Humble yourselves, and continue in prayer unto him. Alma 34:19

Pray always, that you may come off conqueror; yea, that you may conquer Satan, and that you may escape the hands of the servants of Satan that do uphold his work. D&C 10:5

....I say unto you that ye must pray always, and not faint; that ye must not perform any thing unto the Lord save in the first place ye shall pray unto the Father in the name of Christ, that he will consecrate thy performance unto thee, that thy performance may be for the welfare of thy soul. 2Nephi 32:9

Yesterday I was asked to substitute at the last minute in Relief Society and the lesson was on Praying. This lesson was for me! And I needed to read and hear what the Spirit had for me to see and hear in this lesson. I needed the reminder of how important our conversations with our Heavenly Father are and by not praying we are opening that door to Satan.

I let my own tiredness or distracted mind keep me from the most important conversations I could have in a day and that is exactly what the adversary wants.

This lesson I know was laid in my hands yesterday in a way that I would hear the message as a gentle reminder of my own....selfishness... I think. I wouldn't have listened the way I needed to if the teacher would have been able to come. I am thankful for the basicness of the gospel and that the answers we need are right there all we need is to listen.

Change

Change is an everyday thing. It happens because we choose to or because we have to and when we really don't want to but are forced to.

This weekend our desk top computer died we have not a clue why and so the laptop has now become our main computer. Which I am Ok with, hubby on the other hand....This was one of those changes for him that he didn't want to do but....was forced to.

 I took it in stride. I didn't like loosing the pictures I have saved on there. There were not to many since I had already burned all of last years to disks and cleared away for this year. I had also already burned other files etc I knew I might need later for callings and personal things. The pictures well they are saved on this blog, some at least but the rest no. But I'm OK with it, change doesn't bother me... to much. Somethings I am a little spastic about and have a hard time but most things I am mellow about.

Lifestyle changes can be so hard for most. I know when hubby and I decided we wanted something more for our daughter than what we could offer when she was a baby that was hard. We gave up all our comforts so that she and future children would grow up in a respectful way and learn to love Heavenly Father. Something hubby and I had not learned.

But through the years we have through our own hardwork and the love Heavenly Father has for us changed. We have moved closer to how he sees us instead of where our lives at the beginning were taking us. Our children have grown in the gospel and we have learned from them and others around us.

Change was hard and at times not wanted. But we have over the years climbed those hills of heartache and frustration and learned to change and grow in our new path. We have never done it alone we have  had Heavenly Father guiding us all the way his love for us has sustained us and helped us become more than we were.

One day I hope to see myself as he sees me. He knows I can be so much more. And one day I will be what he knows I can but only with change and most importantly his love guiding me.

Now the desk was my sewing desk an old writing desk that was my grandmothers. It is from the 40's about maybe late 30's. I decided to change around things. This is now our office desk and my armoire that was the office is now our sewing area.

Because of this change and move around of furniture. Our small living room is now even bigger than before. So even when the change that is to come isn't welcomed or wanted at the beginning it can be what is needed and later very much enjoyed.

Being a Helpmeet

I have been pondering alot about my life and purpose and finding that little niche for me without me feeling I am stretching myself to far. As women we say yes to it all and then we burn out very fast. I know my role as a daughter of Heavenly Father, wife and mother are top of that list.....

Over the years I have read thru the scriptures to guide me in these roles, watched the examples of women around me, and prayed hard to let go of pride so that I may learn. I have learned and I have learned alot but I have still been very selfish in my dealings with my husband and others. Its a very natural attribute for all and those who overcome it you can see it in their countenance and WOW are they women that are so inspiring. But they are few and far betweem unfortunately.

Will I ever be that woman? I have very little hope in that quest but I can strive my hardest to get as close to it as possible.

On my quest I have turned to the scriptures more lately and have studied Proverbs 31 instead of just reading it. Thru that study I have learned more than I have in the past.

She is not just a woman who works with her hands by sewing, cooking, being frugal, business minded, etc. But she is dependable, trustworthy, she doesn't gossip, or backbite her husband, complaining isn't in her character, being humble and uplifting are. She isn't one to stick her nose in the affairs of others but is compassionate and understanding.

She is forgiving and excepts all equally. She forgets their past sins and looks only to the future. She strives to learn the skills needed to help her husband and family instead of hindering them, she takes care of herself so she is not held down by her own infirmities. She is trusted and shows kindness and wisdom to all equally......

I know so many more things can be said about this woman... So do we know a woman who fits this description? I know many who have attributes of this woman but not all, I know some who come very close. Is she an unattainable woman, will we every be like this woman? I think we can...

Selfishness is our hinderance. Aimee at Momzoo did a series last week on "Lovin' that Man" I did not participate but it made me really think of all the selfishness I have when dealing with my husband.  I know I am a very selfish person and  I am striving to overcome it as with many faults in my character.

By using the example of the women in the scriptures I have my guides to what I want to be, the women in my life who are good examples are my visual aides in this quest.

It still doesn't help me decided how far I should stretch myself with my busy life but it gives me my priorities so that the decisions are easier and whether I should say yes or no is a little clearer.

"However talented individuals may be in administrative matters; however eloquent they may be in expressing their veiws; however learned they may be in worldly things----they will be denied the sweet whisperings of the spirit that might have been theirs unless they pay the price of studing, pondering, and praying about the scriptures"

Bruce R. McConkie